Becoming Parents – 2 Month Update

 beth - pregnantIt’s hard to believe that this was just over 2 months ago.  It seems like  a distant memory. At the time pregnancy and delivery seemed like the challenge to overcome, but boy was I in for a surprise.  It turns out that motherhood was the challenge that I should have been anticipating.  In all honesty, I did very little to prepare for what has turned out to be one of the most life altering events that I trust I will ever endure.  I really didn’t give much thought to how things would be different, and I actually uttered the following sentences “It will be so great to have some time off work when the baby comes.  I will get so much done.”  I mean I pretty much sealed my own fate.

The truth of the matter is that free time is a luxury these days.  I’ve got quite a demanding little man, and nearly all of my time and attention is spent meeting his unrelenting needs.  This adjustment has been quite a challenge for someone who likes to keep busy with her own stuff.  I’ve since had to slow down and realize…wait for it…it’s not just about me anymore.  I’m sure most mother’s realize this before the baby comes, but in thinking over some of the advice I got when I was pregnant, maybe not… 

Before Aiden was born, I had two different, unrelated people tell me that the best advice that they ever got before they had kids was that you don’t have to feel bad if you don’t immediately fall in love with your baby.  Being completely oblivious to the change that was about to occur, I really didn’t understand  what they meant by this advice.   I’ve since given it quite a bit of thought and come up with my own interpretation.  This advice goes out to my friends that haven’t yet had children.

I think what they meant is that it’s okay if it takes time to love your new role as mommy (and daddy for that matter).  It’s true that some people were just born to be parents, but it’s also true that some people have to grow into it.  From the first evening that the baby screamed for hours, it was apparent that both Dan and I fell into the latter category.  It takes time and endless patience (which we’re still learning) to figure out what a baby needs and wants and until you do, you really start to think that you’ve permanently ruined your life.  I actually think you have to love your baby from the beginning…otherwise you’d never get through what I like to call the selfish phase.   We were shocked that no one ever talks about how hard it’s going to be in the beginning and maybe it’s because they feel bad or maybe because they truly forget or maybe because they’re dealing with a whole new set of problems, but I think my friends’ advice was the closest thing we got to a clue. 

The good news?  It gets better.  Now, nearly two months in, I can honestly say that I really love my new life and all the crazy challenges and amazing possibilities it brings.  I look forward to waking up everyday to the enigma that is Aiden.  I mean how could I not being around a face like this everyday?


View Aiden - August 24
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2 Responses to “Becoming Parents – 2 Month Update”

  1. Lisa Troglin Says:

    Wow! Someday this will be a very important memory for you and for Aiden! Parenting is a drastic change, but it is also the greatest acheivement!

  2. ginni Says:

    I agree with Lisa and would like to add a bit to it…you will think at times that you have finally mastered motherhood…then BAM upside your head will come a new trial or tribulation….and you will again be feeling like WTF did I do this for…but it too passes…They are great great joys and wonders in so many ways Beth…We all feel at a loss many many times…some of us more than others, but then you sit back down the road and look back and it is truely amazing!!! Obviously you are a GREAT Mommy as it is in the family gene pool to be one (heehee)….keep the thoughts and pix comming…they are great and you will be glad you did this down the road!!! xoxoxox

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